Breathing into Being

Maha Rose Healing Center was warmly lit on a Friday night, filled with a dozen or so people willing to open their hearts and get free. We were all there to participate in a breath work session (my first), a form of active meditation in which you breathe vibrantly through the mouth to flush out stuck energy and potentially have an emotional release.

As a group, we talked a bit about how the breath can bring you out of your body and into a psychadelic sort of place. We all shared our intentions for this practice, and laid down to start the process.

As I began the breathing pattern, I felt pinned by the weight of the energy. It started in my third eye chakra and spread down through my body. I felt an intense vibration like no meditation has ever brought me. I let go and allowed myself to be consumed by the feelings - physical and emotional. My hands cramped up and felt as if I was holding tennis balls in each one, squeezing tightly. I physically vibrated as if I had laid over the bass speaker at a stadium concert. The energy was all-consuming. I felt specifically that it was circulating and buzzing in my throat and diaphragm.

I was overwhelmed, but it was joyous. I cried tears of happiness at what I was feeling. I sang out so loud and made my heart split open. 

I hoped that going into my second session, I would access that positive energy again. However, going through this, I know that I'll get what I need from the experience. If I need to let go of something negative, it will come out of me. 

I was happy on my second visit to also bring my husband, who was game to try it to deepen his own meditation practice and get some clarity on creative projects. My intention this time was to bring some productive energy to my own creative pursuits. With a different guide on this journey, we began by talking about the energy of the Supermoon, which came quite close to us this past weekend, amplifying some of our emotions and perhaps contributing positively to our creative energy and our drive to explore it. 

As we settled in for this round, I kept my intention in the forefront of my mind as I breathed rhythmically with those around me. It was a deliberate choice to not lose myself completely, but direct my energy and intention to one specific part of my mind. I experienced many of the same physical sensations, but this time I accessed some memories and past feelings that surrounded my own creativity. I had been holding onto a few hang-ups or some "baggage" relating to the music that I once created, that had at one point in my life, consumed my vision.

Upon leaving that session, I do feel as though I have answers to some things I have been sitting on for a long time. I was able to reflect upon the past 10 years and see how the choices I made at different times and under varying circumstances set me on a path that led me to my current state. I also was able to see that unconsciously, I was letting external factors dictate certain parts of my emotional/mental state. I had too readily allowed my creativity to be swayed by those around me, for better or for worse. 

I feel empowered now to really express myself and dive into projects, regardless of outcome or the work required to realize them. I  cleared out my heart and throat chakras and released some old, nasty stuck energy.

I feel lighter. I feel love. I feel it all!